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IRVING, Texas - Never is nice to revel in the misery of others.
I'm just sayin', came across these headlines in papers along the Eastern Seaboard this morning.
Big Ugly
Eagles Gag On Cupcake.
Rock Bottomless.
Those stand for, in order:
- The Giants losing by 21 to the Saints.
- The Eagles losing 13-9 to the Raiders.
- The Redskins losing 14-6 to the erstwhile winless Chiefs in a game without a touchdown, then losing their offensive coordinator, who unlike those other fired offensive coordinators so far this season, was not fired by the head coach since they used to be one in the same.
Hard to imagine, isn't it, that the Giants, with disciplinarian coach Tom Coughlin barking orders like some drill sergeant, committing nine penalties for 110 yards.
Hard to imagine with offensive guru Andy Reid on board, the Eagles could play an entire game against the previously 1-4 Raiders and fail to score a touchdown.
Or that 2/3rds of the teams in the NFC East playing on Sunday - Eagles and Redskins - failed to score even a measly touchdown.
My, my, how sitting back on a Sunday afternoon with nothing better to do than watch and analyze all the other teams while yours had kicked off its shoes and put up its feet on a bye weekend can make your problems not seem so bad. Why, the Cowboys did absolutely nothing on Sunday, yet ended up gaining ground, coming out tied with the Eagles at 3-2 for second place in the division, both now just 1½ games behind the Giants, who have played one more game than the second-place teams.
"It's hard to win in this league," said Cowboys head coach Wade Phillips, who has been getting grilled so far for about how the Cowboys have won their three games and roasted for how they lost the other two, all causing Cowboys owner Jerry Jones to answer questions about his job security.
"When I first started in pro football, someone asked me about it, and I said, 'Every play is a crisis.'"
If not play, then for sure game around these parts when it comes to the Cowboys, currently tied for not only that second-best record in the East but the fifth best record in the NFC.
Let's see if you can see anything in common in how the top three teams in the NFC East have gotten to their records with just one exception. You know the Cowboys put up their three wins against Tampa Bay (0-6), Carolina (2-3) and Kansas City (1-5).
But did you realize, with the exception of beating the Cowboys (3-2), the Giants' other four wins have come over Washington (2-4), Tampa Bay (0-6), Kansas City (1-5) and Oakland (2-4)? And the Eagles' three wins have been over Carolina (2-3), Kansas City (1-5) and Tampa Bay (0-6).
Well, whoop-de-do.
So as Tony Romo said last Thursday, be careful who you start crowning the 5-0 champions, because by time they reach 10 games, who knows, they already might be retreating back to the pack. Let this thing play out.
That includes the Cowboys, too, who already have seemingly tested the patience of their faithful, although look, how would you like to be Cleveland, where their quarterbacks have combined in the last two games to complete 11 of 43 passes for 155 yards - 122 of those on Sunday - two touchdowns and two interceptions. That's a 37.2 QB rating.
So the Cowboys' biggest sins so far this season have been losing to the Giants by two, losing to the undefeated Broncos by seven on a last-minute touchdown and not beating the Chiefs in regulation. Shame, shame, shame on them.
Wonder if the Redskins would take an overtime win over the Chiefs to prevent them from winning their first game of the season and just third in the past 31? Or if the Eagles, having traveled cross country to face the unbeaten Raiders, would have taken a seven-point victory instead of being party to the Raiders' second victory of the season?
Life in the NFL normally is a close shave. You just hope you're not using the styptic powder too much.
But having said that, we are fixin' to find out just who these Cowboys are - might be. They are moving into the meat of the schedule. It's one thing to lose to previously unbeaten teams. It's one thing to beat those previously winless teams.
Yet, it's more reflective of who you are when you begin playing teams considered to be of your own ilk, like this Sunday's game at Cowboys Stadium against the Atlanta Falcons. The Falcons are 4-1. They are good, but really not yet great, having lost to New England and nearly losing at home to the Bears who left Atlanta last night with bullet holes all in their hind paws.
The Cowboys have the NFL's No. 2 offense going into the Monday night game and the 22nd defense. The Falcons have the No. 18 offense and 23rd defense. The Cowboys have scored 122 points, the Falcons 123. The Cowboys have given up 98 points, the Falcons 77 - in other words, 19.6 a game to 15.4 a game for the Cowboys, so not all that significantly different.
This my friends is one of those barometer games, where you find out just what you are now and what you might be the rest of the season. Not a game you must win, but one you sure would like to win. Quality wins build confidence, and certainly the Cowboys could stand to win back-to-back games for the first time since Nov. 23 and 27 of last year, a nine-game stretch without consecutive wins.
"We need to get an identity for ourselves," Cowboys running back Tashard Choice said. "Put on a push to play a complete game . . . we got to focus on this week and not kill ourselves."
That right there would be a good start - a goal of sorts - to play a complete game, meaning not shoot themselves in the foot as much as they have over the first five games. Because even in victory, the Cowboys have yet to play a complete game, allowing Tampa Bay back in the game at one point, getting shut out the first half by Carolina and, of course, not only allowing Kansas City to get off to a 13-3 lead, but then allowing them to recover at the end to force overtime.
Plus, the Cowboys have to quit all this benevolence stuff. Leave that to Jerry Jones with The Salvation Army. There is no room for charity in actual games. By my count, turnovers in three of the five games have directly led to 34 opposition points, and by directly I mean either a turnover returned for a touchdown, or giving the opponent possession in automatic scoring position.
By no surprise, those 34 points came in the two games the Cowboys lost and the one they won in overtime.
"This is a big game for us, to go in the win column at 4-2 rather than 3-3," Phillips said. "You are kind of spinning your wheels when you're even, so to get two games up on .500, this can be important at the end of the year."
But it's more than that. The result starts revealing just who you are, a team leaching off the bottom feeders, or one capable of holding its own swimming with the blood-thirsty sharks.
And we are about to find out which over this next month with Atlanta, Seattle, Philadelphia and Green Bay all lined up in a row, their combined record 12-9 and winning percentage of .571 right their with the Cowboys' .600.
So if Wade's right and every play indeed is a crisis in this NFL of ours, then the Cowboys now are entering a critical stretch of this season, needing to win more than they lose in these four games if they are going to be for real.
Wonder what they got.
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Mickey Spagnola - 
